On Christmas Eve 2004 he was diagnosed with three types of cancer: thyroid - easily treatable; bone - a tumour on the spine that could be controlled with radiation therapy; and lung .
The lung was the most worrying as his father & 2 of his uncles had died of it.
Dad started treatment at Peter Mac just after Christmas - me, my sister & 2 of my brothers organised a roster among ourselves to drive mum & dad to and from Sale, and to and from wherever they were staying in Melbourne to Peter Mac.
My England based brother came over for a quick visit in early march 2005 - dad was on a real high then - he looked amazingly fit & healthy.
Then a little over 2 weeks later dad was in Peter Mac & we were told he wouldn't be coming home.
But he did.
His condition started to deteriorate in late June and we organised for England brother to come back. We kept telling dad "Cam will be home tomorrow morning, Cam will be home tomorrow morning"
Dad made it to tomorrow morning but passed away before Cam arrived home.
I've blocked a lot of that time out of my memory but there are some things that stand out.
My youngest brother & I leaving Sale @ 2.30 am to drive to Tullamarine to pick up England brother knowing that he was too late.
That drive - it was extremely foggy - we couldn't see anything through the fog - we were tired, emotional and (with hindsight) should not have been driving.
Breaking the news to England brother.
Calling in at sister's house & brother's house @ 5 am to pick up clothes etc for funeral. Neighbour of brother called police when he saw two people enter brother's house & emerge 20 minutes later with suitcase.
Now, five years on, I look back on the memories & treasure them - dad was always there for us. If we were involved in something then dad was there cheering us on.
When my (then) 4 year old brother was told he was too young to join the under 10 footy team (the youngest team) dad and a mate started an under 7 team and a football club (which went on to produce several AFL players).
When the family moved to Sale dad's Saturdays were spent trying to watch my sister & I play netball before heading off to the football (where he was usually coach/runner/statistician for my brothers' teams).
He MC'd the calisthenics concerts (mum taught calisthenics in melbourne & in sale).
He was at various times President of the Sale Football Club, President of the Sale Cricket Club, on the committee of the Sale Basketball Association, Araluen PS's parents committee, Sale High's parents committee. He was a founding member of the Doncaster Heights Primary School committee (not to mention again the Doncaster Heights football club).
Then there was his 49 years & 10 months as a Freemason (both in Melbourne & in Sale).
His long term devotion to the Fitzroy Football Club (despite his favourite cousin playing in several premierships in the 1950s for Melbourne).
His unique collection of McCallum Whisky memorabilia (which was written up in several publications here and overseas)
But most of all he was Dad and I still miss him.
Bruce Robert Malcolm. June 30, 1936 - June 27, 2005.
1 comment:
Thanks for sharing your memories of your Dad. *hugs*
I lost my Dad a little over 18 months ago. He was a similar age to your Dad - too young.
Like you, I've found it easier to not think about the hard times leading up to his passing. I think it will be a while before I'm ready to talk about it like you have. But I hope that I never forget the wonderful things about him. I really enjoyed reading about the kind of person your Dad was - a man of many interests who was devoted to his family and community.
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